So, one reason I like academia is I (perhaps, foolishly) thought I would experience less red-tape and bureaucratic nonsense in this world than in the 'real world.' [I love the insinuation that I don't work/live in real world--see RYS for eloquent rants about this issue]. Yet I spent the bulk of my morning adjusting my schedule to conform to University guidelines about how I spend my time in my office and how available I make myself to the students. The rest of my morning (when I wasn't in class) was spent emailing a student who despite our multiple meetings, agreed upon schedule, and tens of emails has proceeded to not make the necessary schedule changes to her schedule. Thus ensuring paperwork nightmares for me. Meanwhile, while in my office hours (expect one students that I asked to come by my office and one of my research assistants), the only visitors I got were the following:
[Open scene]
A professor is busily typing away at a key board. Surrounding her are files of various documents. Occasionally, she stops typing and looks curiously through the packet of papers. It is as if she is trying to figure out what tell a student who has messed up her schedule and refused (despite multiple meetings and emails) to fix it as instructed. A familiar face bounds in the office. Character is wearing a 'Hooters: Delightfully tacky, yet unrefined' t-shirt with no sense of the irony that Hooters gear is neither delightful or appropriate to wear around professors. The student bounds in...
Hooters: What's up?
Professor [trying, hopefully successfully, to hide both her disdain for the interruption and shirt, as well as her confusion as to who this familiar face actually is]: Just working, How are you? [Hoping the answer will provide details to the identity of this familiar face].
Hooters: I was wondering if I could use your printer.
Professor: For what exactly? [Still unsure of identity of Hooters]
Hooters: An statistics assignment that is due. My printer broke. If now is not a good time, I can come back.
[Character note: The professor does not teach statistics.]
Professor [With a strained expression]: You do know that there is a computer lab at the end of the hallway.
Hooters: No, I didn't.
Professor: Well, you need to use that lab, because I am in the middle of something that I needs to get done, so I cannot print out your assignment.
Hooters: Okay, thanks [Bounds out of office].
End scene.
As Hooters left my office, I realized how I knew her. She was the crappy, no-good, left me stranded, had-to-have-meetings-with-her-advisor, didn't hold up her end of the bargain Graduate Assistant I had last Fall. They are required to do 10 hours a week to stay eligible for their stipends. She was falling behind and wasn't completing anything I asked of her. She came to me begging for more work to make up the time lost. I gave her a project that I desperately needed done and it would have given her enough hours. It was perfect--she could do it at home (she has a tough schedule, poor baby) , the time commitment was pretty subjective (so she could fudge a bit on how hard she worked, and it was easy (perhaps a bit boring, but easy). I kept emailing her to ask for updates and to send me what she had accomplished. Finally at the end of the semester, I received all of the materials back. She had accomplished exactly 0% of the project. I was left high and dry (and screwed quite frankly). Did she have to return her stipend, make up those hours, or face any consequence from her department---nope.
Now she wants to borrow my printer and take my time away. Really?
The second visitor I got was a student looking for Dr. Frank Abstentia. This professor (who I have yet to blog about) is perpetually absent (hence his name). Much work of the department is done in his absence. He is wasted space (both literally, in that he has lots of claim to space in building, and figuratively). This student wanted to know where Dr. Abstentia was--like I know, like I care. So to Student Tight Pants, I say: Sorry your advisor sucks.
So to make a long story actually end--why do I need to be more available and more in my office? The students who need to see me, don't. And the time-suckers of the world always drop by. Not to mention that my being here mandates I deal with other people's messes.
Repeat working mantra.
Has anyone coined the phrase, blog-therapy---or perhaps blogapy. Because I always feel like I can let go of an issue once I have written about it here. [Perhaps, since I have been blogging for only a month, always is a misleading term. But you get the idea]
P.P.S. The student who I spent the morning is now on her way here to suck all of the remaining time out of my life.
